The best cancer advice

Today, I continued some research I had been doing for one of my books.

I'm partly writing about the toll child cancer takes on the parents/carers.
Its a bit of a no-brainer really,"what? your child having cancer effects you? way!!!!!" I can hear the critics cry.

But to be more precise, I'm writing about the different ways to keep yourself going during 3 gruelling years of chemotherapy, coupled with the fact that you are even more terrified when the little darlings come off their treatment (its the waiting and not knowing). 
I'm sorry but normal parents/people just couldn't understand and good for them because everyone shouldn't have to feel our misery.

So today I was reading about the adrenalin/cortisol effects on the body i.e. what happens on a biological scale when stress is experienced for a prolonged period and the effects of that long term stress on the body - 

And unfortunately, I started laughing -
The symptoms they listed, I have probably experienced all of them, at one time or another, it was just a shit bad life tick list.

And what was their recommendation for the alleviation of these physically, emotionally and mentally devastating effects? -

1. Reduce the stress in your life.....that would be a lot of sick children up for adoption.

2. Go for a walk ..........and what do I do with the child? Do I prop the sick bucket under their chin and say 'get on with it on your own for a while, I need to de-stress'

3. Lighten up, nothing is that bad really .....could the author please go to a child cancer ward and tell the parents that? because those parents have a lot of internal anger and beating up the author would help them to release it.

4. Consult your Doctor - I know I have a particular block about anti-depressants but I can safely assure any parent of a child with cancer that taking anti-depressants will not cure your child's cancer. 

After realising the suggestions on all the sites were pathetic - I decided to tell you one of mine.(pre book publishing)

It is the thing that most cancer parents do, but don't realise how powerful it is.

See things as you want them to be and not how they actually are.

We keep talking and planning later on, 'after this' - both short term and long term.

For example:
if the child is having a painful procedure done or having IV chemo -  
We say 'what do you fancy for tea? Is there a film you want to watch? shall we all play a family game tonight, if you feel up to it?'

If we can't travel at the minute - we plan the big holidays anyway - 'where would you like to see in the world?' -
Get a world map and mark off the places you're all going to visit. Which country/cities first?

But we do plan small getaways in this country- there are many organisation that will help you do this safely, Clic Sargent is a great resource in the UK that helps you do this.

Keep making the child think about their future with excitement -this obviously depends on their age. 

But, I repeatedly had conversations about:
What career do you want when you grow up? 
What car are you going to drive? 
What will be your first property house or flat? 
Where do you fancy living? 

The power in future-focused, happy conversations isn't some Life Coaching strategy, no, its a way of making the kid/teenager see that this will soon be over and life WILL go on.

Death is not an option, never has been and never will be. 

The future looks bright and contains no illness.

That's how we cancer parents roll.


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